Volunteer Doltism

I read a great editorial this week in the Democrat by Bob Gabordi. He was opining concerning people who sit next to you at sporting events and scream out criticism and obscenities at players, coaches, officials, cheerleaders, grounds crew, weathermen, the person who sang the National anthem, etc. You know the ones I mean. They look like the polar opposite of an athlete. They are generally morbidly obese and shun personal hygiene. They always seem to find a seat near me at such events.

Mr. Gabordi was saying that such people should have to seek licensure for such a privilege. They should be made to pass an examination that qualifies them to speak out on the nuances of how to pitch to a batter with one base open in a tie game during the third phase of an equatorial equinox. Once they have established thier expertise then we can hang on their every gutterally engineered comment. Until they pass such a test then they must, by law, keep their opinions to themselves.

I responded to him with the following perspective. I believe that such people who peform thusly do society an advanced service. Lump them in with the people who wear offensive tee shirts, place distasteful bumber stickers on their cars, tattoo themselves with antisocietal rhetoric, and pierce themselves in strange places.

If we were to legislate that people with IQ's below 70 must wear some sort of indication of that fact, in a public display, on thier person at all times, the ACLU would have a field day. Yet these people voluntarily display such in their behaviour and their choice of outward appearance. I think we are a very fortunate society that being the case.

An example. Once upon a time my good golf buddy and I were getting ready to tee off at Seminole golf course for a relaxing 4 hour visit mixed with violent thrashing of golf clubs. As is the case, often, the starter sent another twosome to join us. One of these golfers looked like a character from the movie Scarface . Clenched in his goon-like face was a cigar of enormous proportion. On his tee shirt was a declarative addressed to Seminole fans that was offensively distasteful. It had to do with an unnatural act involving those of Seminole allegiance. How fortunate were we that we could read this fellow's shirt and make a snap decision that we were NOT going to spend our next 4 hours with him. I told the starter so. I went on to suggest that it was a poor reflection on the golf course management that such a person, wearing such a tee shirt would even be allowed on the course. The starter nervously arranged another pairing and my friend and I enjoyed a lovely round of golf. Had this fellow not advertised his shallowness of character we would have been stuck in a distateful circumstance.

It is my opinon that we are fortunate to live in a society that allows free expression of character. We can therefore shun the perpetrator and live our lives on a higher plane. We can thusly protect ourselves and our children by placing a respectable distance between ourselves and people of such an ilk.

Please visit me on the web at http://elvass.com/.